No, I am not blogging about the dreaded weapon of mass destruction, the hydrogen bomb, instead my topic is a different awe-inspiring weapon, Harvard Law School, or as we sometimes referred to it - the H-bomb. And dropping the H-bomb refers to the point in a conversation when you mention where you go/went to law school.
Now let's be clear. I did not go to law school, my husband did and he went to Harvard Law School. And it is the mystique that is Harvard Law School that I would like to discuss. There are several reactions that are elicited when Matt or I mention where he went to law school - ranging from sneering to awe to almost worshipful*
It's such an interesting thing. Either way, it is almost always an awkward situation. So awkward that neither of us usually drops the H-bomb unless forced to. We usually say, "when Matt was in law school", or "when we lived in Cambridge". Or even less specific, "when we lived in Boston while Matt was in law school." Only when directly asked - "What law school did Matt go to?" do we respond with the true answer.
The question is why? Why? Why do we feel the need to mask where he went to school? Are we ashamed? Certainly not.** Are we a little embarrassed? Perhaps. I really don't know the answer. Mostly, it's probably because we don't want to look like we're bragging and we feel that by even dropping the H-bomb that we are in your face bragging. But, that's where he went to school. Those are the facts, ma'am. Why can't we just say it?
If he had gone to any other school, we'd probably have no problem saying it. Let's say, for instance that Matt attended Columbia instead of Harvard. Columbia has an excellent law school, one of the best in the nation. But, I think the difference is that you're average Joe on the street doesn't know the major rankings of law schools in the country. He has heard of Harvard though, and he knows it's, well "da bomb."
And so the H-bomb is both a curse and a blessing. It's a curse because we can't even admit in normal conversation that Matt went there without feeling awkward, haughty, or stuffy.
But the same reasons that make Harvard a curse, make it blessing. Matt will always be proud of the name of the school on his resume. He will always have confidence in securing employment. That is why he chose Harvard above the other law schools that accepted him. And we are really grateful for that.
Nevertheless, will we always lower our voice and avert our eyes when we admit where he went to school? I just don't know...
* The actual response was "You're gold! Can I touch you?"
**Certainly Matt should not be ashamed. He worked dang hard to get into Harvard. He had exceptional undergrad grades, an excellent LSAT score, and a well-rounded portfolio of life and work experience. No one should be ashamed of that.
6 comments:
Bang-o. Hold that head high and tell it like it is. Come on, Harvard Law School? Shout it loud and proud.
The place holds almost mythic status to those of us normal folk. I know you're not snooty about it, but sheesh, don't hide it.
It will serve you well, over the years, and not just professionally either.
Just to correct a minor error in this post. "H-Bomb" refers to Harvard in any capacity--not just the law school. In fact, that's the title of the controversial magazine featuring scantily clad undergrads that came out while I was there.
Point remains that you likely worked your ARSE off to get there. Don't put it in the drawer and forget about it.
Not that you should have your license plates changed or anything, but don't be ashamed to let it out, either.
Good job. I enjoy both your blogs, guys.
Don't worry--the diploma's on the wall of my office, right by the door for even casual passersby to see.
The problem: Harvard's so pretentious the diploma's in Latin. No one will know how cool I am unless they can understand VNIVERSITAS HARVARDIANA. Silly Harvard.
Interestingly, when I was a kid, my dad had his Masters of Education diploma at home. It was in Latin as well, and I thought all college students would be required to learn to be conversant in Latin as a prequisite to graduation.
Interesting, and the University was not nearly as pretentious as Harvard.
I see this so often...
Don't you see that the hesitancy to mention where you went to school only adds to the perception of pretentiousness?
I've taken the approach of not hiding from it, and then acting like it doesn't matter (which it really doesn't in my interpersonal relationships).
I've noticed, at least in my ward, I've fared FAR better than another associate of mine with the same Harvard affliction who, in an Elder's Quorum get to know you, decided to play coy. People saw right through it and found it a somewhat manipulative way to add even MORE emphasis to having gone to Harvard.
He ended up having to explain the whole dance (with an ill advised analogy comparing a Harvard Law School Degree to owning a Ferrari), which admittedly, I even found to be pretentious. That's probably because him doing the dance made it clear to me that, in HIS OWN mind, he thought it was a pretty big deal.
In the end, I've found it easiest to not make it a big deal by not hiding from it and not legitimizing the perception in some people's minds that there would be any reason to feel pretentious.
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