Mother's Day

I've had a great mother's day today. It started with breakfast in bed, which I didn't know was planned. I was then presented with coupons from Ellie and Annie promising to do little things for me like "a really big cleanup" or "helping to make lunch with Daddy" or "a big hug, a big kiss, and a big snuggle."

They gave me coupons for my birthday too and I really liked it because it is something the girls can actually do for me, rather than going with Matt to buy something, which they don't have the money to get anyway. This time Ellie thought of most of her coupons by herself, which was really nice. I can't wait to cash them in. And Matt has given me license to buy myself some new walking sandals which I am very excited about. Yea!

When Matt asked me what I wanted for Mothers Day, I told him I only wanted two things - a Sunday nap and someone else to make dinner. I got both of those things too. I had a wonderful nap. And Matt and the older girls made me my favorite dinner - pizza. We topped it off with very yummy brownies.*

We also got to talk to Matt's mom and dad and left a message for my parents too. All in all a wonderful mother's day.

On the note of mothers and motherhood, I got pretty frustrated last Monday. All day I kept thinking about how everything I do is for someone else and that very little of what I do is for myself. It was quite overwhelming for me to realize that I wake up every morning usually because someone else woke me up and I instantly start doing something for one of my little girls - change diapers, wash little hands, clothe little people, make meals for little people, wash plates, clean up toys, drive to music class, preschool, read books, entertain (lots and lots of entertaining), etc, etc. There is never a quiet moment. And I was frustrated.

Even the time I spent at the gym didn't seem like "my time" or something that didn't have to do with my kids because if I didn't have a baby four months ago, I wouldn't need to lose 20 lbs in the first place. I've heard the saying that "If you've got kids, you ain't got nothing but kids." And that was ringing particularly true to me on Monday.

But I finally pulled myself together a little bit and tried to get some perspective. I won't be changing diapers for the rest of my life. Someday, I will have the time to do things just for me. And there are a few things I do for myself (this blog, for instance), my bookclub, and I even get a shower in too.

But as a mother I have the unique and precious opportunity to shape a person's life. My sweet girls are clean slates and they depend upon me to not only provide for their immediate physical well being (which I do a lot of by the way), but also to care for them emotionally, spiritually, and intellectually too. They are so loving and caring. And yes, they aren't perfect and they can wine and complain like the best of them, but they are pretty sweet and wonderful and they love me a lot. And I love them too, more than I can express. I sure love the little girls that made me a mom in the first place. They are pretty fantastic.

Here's a recent photo of my three angels. I love them very, very much.

*I love brownies, every kind really. But I tell you, I was introduced to the Ghirardelli's triple chocolate brownies from Costco a few years ago and I just can't get myself to make any other brownies. They are simply the best I've ever had.